Mourning Time

by Team Smile and Nod

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  • Digital Album
    Streaming + Download

    *This 2nd album from Team Smile and Nod, an electro folk pop duo, explores the constantly morphing state of mourning in an oddly uplifting and quirky manner.

    *Immediate download of this album in your choice of 320k mp3, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire.

    *With the download, you will receive a pdf version of the album cover and liner notes.

    *BONUS #1- Legible Lyric Book (9 page pdf)

    *BONUS #2- Truth and Fact REMIX by Rich Ratvasky.
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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    *Hold it in your hands! Hand it to your friends! Look at the pretty pictures! Read the itty, bitty lyric sheet! Ooooh and ahhhhh at the beauty!

    *This CD was professionally replicated. Kara and Rich glued the artwork to the digipak for a wonderfully colorful d.i.y. package. They used rubber cement so they could rub any excess glue into little booger balls. They personally folded the little liner notes into a tri-fold and stuck them into the digipak pocket. The liner notes have a gorgeous pic of the ravishing duo and song lyrics on the other side. The original artwork is by the crazy-talented Jesse Smith.

    *Due to the d.i.y. packaging of this CD, there will be some variation based on our gluing and folding skills.

    *We ship through USPS and send it First-Class or First-Class International.

    *Also includes immediate download of 15-track album in your choice of 320k mp3, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire.

    *We are 100% indie. Thinkroot Records is our label. Any $ you spend here goes directly to the band... and we'll use it to do more music projects.     ... more
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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Why not grab TSAN's 1st album, "Look Both Ways Before You Die", for only 5 bucks while you're at it? Already got it? Give it to friend! Awwww yeah!

    *This package includes an imediate download of "Mourning Time", "Mourning Time" CD, and "Look Both Ways Before You Die" CD.
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  • Full Digital Discography Full Digital Discography

    Get all 3 Team Smile and Nod releases available on Bandcamp and save 25%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Dust from the Stars [Single], Mourning Time, and Look Both Ways Before You Die. , and , .

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1.
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2.
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15.
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credits

released March 31, 2011

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Team Smile and Nod Columbus

Team Smile and Nod is an electro folk pop duo from Columbus, Ohio that formed in 2004. About a week after swapping demo CDs, Rich Ratvasky (artist-producer) surprised Kara E. Sherman (singer-songwriter) with a remix of one of her songs. Inspired by the remix, they merged their musical styles into an upbeat, melody-driven, politically-inspired fusion. ... more

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Track Name: Truth and Fact
WORDS:

I don’t know how to change my mind
The way I process, the way it works
Anything embarrassing, anything that hurts
I push away…

I’ve gone there and
You’ve gone there and
We go there
And try to heal
And you
Are the only one
Who has helped me breathe
Truth and fact
Back into me.

I prefer to forget who I was when we met
I’m just glad that you were attracted
To helping heal my blocked out hurt
You knew there was more to me
Than my fictional character
You knew how to lead her back to me
Back to us

Cuz, I’ve gone there and
You’ve gone there and
We go there
And try to heal
And you
Are the only one
Who has helped me breathe
Truth and fact
Back into me.

I don’t know what else to do with this
I know I’m still missing a few pieces but
I also know I’ll never be where I was
I finally like myself and I believe in me
And I wish- I wish for your confidence in me
In my honesty- in my ability
I wish- I wish that you could completely trust me…

Cuz, I’ve gone there and
You’ve gone there and
We go there
And try to heal
And you
Are the only one
Who has helped me breathe
Truth and fact
Back into me.

You are the only one who has helped me breathe…
Track Name: I Wonder
WORDS:

Life’s been looking kind of bleak
From under these redwood trees
I wish you were here with me but
You’re not.
The rain makes me feel all alone
Fills the river while I sing this song
No one’s here, just me
I’m all alone, all alone

And I wonder where you are
I wonder where you are.

I can’t quite get a hold of my life
Nothing ever seems just right
I dream of you holding me
So tight.
NO.
Reality isn’t my world
Need I prove this again for you?
How can I make my would open to you
How can I, how how can I?
Cuz I-

I wonder where you are
I wonder where you are.

I can’t hang alone much longer
Reality hiding you
I can’t hang alone much long
Without you with- without you with-
Without you with- without you- cuz I

I wonder where you are
I wonder where you are.
Track Name: Unknown
WORDS:

Desperate- for reason
However- make-believe
Sometimes I wonder
If the faithless have more faith
Believing that we don’t know
And it will be okay

Willing- to kill
Willing- to hate
Believing whatever
Their leaders proclaim
Ignoring the truth
Our world displays

Fear- of the unknown
Fear- stunts our growth
There’s power in knowing
Not knowing is okay
There’s strength in understanding
It might be better this way

Love- within
Love- is everything…
Believing in people
To do what’s right
Miracles within
Our human insights

Desperate- for reason
However- make-believe
Sometimes I wonder
If the faithless have more faith
Believing that we don’t know
And it will be okay
Track Name: Come Back Here
WORDS:

I don’t know how you could run away from me
I know I did it to you, but I came back
It’s not your time to fly
Can’t watch my father cry
Can’t breathe, think without you here
I can’t feel.

You told me when your mother died
Nothing was harder to feel
You said your connection was lost
Unable to ever heal
And I believed you…
I believe.

Don’t disappear
Come back here…

It feels sadistic to sleep, sadistic to eat
I’m angry I can’t tell you how angry I am
Not at you
I know you wouldn’t choose
I know you didn’t choose
You used to tell me you would die
If something were to happen to me
Where does that leave me…?

Don’t disappear
Come back here…
Track Name: Experiment
WORDS:

What is that you’re scared of
When you see a girl like me
Are you worried that I might
Rub off on your kids
And they’ll turn gay
Just like you were in college

But that was just an experiment
A one time, two time, three time thing
That was just an experiment
A silly little love fling a ding-ding

And then your hubby with his lovey beer belly
Has got his memories buried so so deep
But he can’t forget that at the key party
His uhh was fucked by the hairy bear daddy
And he came so hard, so so hard
So so hard he still has wet dreams

But that was just an experiment
A two time, four time, six time thing
That was just an experiment
A silly little love fling a ding-ding

But hey you can’t blame him cuz you were the one
Who suggested that you all should switch it up
And she was so willing and ready
And she wiggled and giggled as soon as your tongue…
Touched

But that too was just an experiment
A five time, ten time, anytime thing
That was just an experiment
A silly little love fling a ding-ding

So tell me how is it that I’m the weird one
When I am committed to the lady I love
I’m not lying or cheating
Yearning or burning
Dreaming or scheming
The next fancy orgy
And yet I can’t marry cuz you’re too scared
That somehow gays will destroy the family
You’ll do it yourself by hiding yourself
And pretending that your life is just an experiment

But that was just an experiment
A one time, two time, three time thing
That was just an experiment
A silly little love fling a ding-ding
Track Name: If You Stop
WORDS:

I’ve got this look on my face
To construe that I care
And I guess I’m lying
To you and me both
But really- who cares?
And that’s the tough thing
It’s hard to stop
Telling the truth
Once you start
And you start to realize
How full of shit we all are

If you stop to think
If you stop to think
When you stop to think
When you stop to think

And you can make yourself sick
When you realize we don’t have a choice
Without changing the foundation of your life…

If you stop to think…

So you pick and you choose
When you abuse your morals
Your hopes, your heart
And you know as long as you’re living within
All you learned as a kid
You’ll always be stuck…

If you stop to think…
Track Name: Can You Feel It
WORDS:

I don’t know where these hopeful words come from
My mom passed away three months ago- tomorrow
I’ve been thinking about fear how it controls the masses
We get so comfortable in states of turmoil
And surrender ourselves to our leaders
But hey I’m just a kid- dealing with my own shit
And I’m stunted by my own thoughts of death

So where does my hope come from?
Can you feel it, can you feel it?

So how can we come up with a new excuse every day
Lack of motivation to portray that person we might be in our mind
Pass me that joint, I’d rather numb mine
Float away with smoke

So where does my hope come from?
Can you feel it, can you feel it?

So filter out those nightmares
Filter out those dreams
The only thing I know for sure is that I know nothing
So welcome disillusion, I miss your soothing thoughts
A cushion for my headache, I’d rather sit and watch.

So where does my hope come from?
Can you feel it, can you feel it?
Track Name: She's Gone
WORDS:

That foreboding feeling I know so well
Flooding my body, taking over myself
My mind pleads with this feeling
For no casualty
By body just knows when there’s been
A tragedy
I got no dream to warn me this time
Must of blocked out my subconscious
Must of blocked out my mind
It’s just too terrifying when
You’re mama dies…

I cried to the crisp New Year’s Eve night
I shook in my girlfriend’s arms
Had her hold me tight
I had to call my siblings
Cuz my papa couldn’t talk
He just kept repeating, repeating
She’s gone…

Some pains don’t leave even when time passes
Some pains don’t leave even when you think they should have
It’s been over a year still doesn’t seem real
I guess when some people die
It never really does seem real
Cuz she’s gone…

So I’ve cried for my mom
I’ve cried for my loss
Feels like we’ve been cheated
Cut off from our bond
I’ve cried for my papa
He lost his life’s partner
I’ve cried for my sister
I’ve cried for my brother
I’ve cried for my girlfriend
How she’ll never fully know her
I’ve cried nephew
And I’ve cried for my uncle
I’ve cried for her friends
Cuz she was so much damn fun
Now I’ve replaced these tears
With straight shots of rum
I’ll have a shot for each of us
And I’ll stop when I’m done
When I’m done
When I’m done
Cuz she’s gone…
Track Name: Build
WORDS:

We build- reconstruct
Piece together- what- was torn apart

The constants keep us
While constantly changing
We maintain what matters most
With our salty sea of sad
And our raw bloody hearts
We maintain what matters most

We build- reconstruct
Piece together- what- was torn apart

Shifty eyes, shifty minds
Shifting all around us
Swiftly sing a different tune
The opportunity has aroused
The excuse- properly executed
Swiftly, swiftly all around us

We build- reconstruct
Piece together- what- was torn apart

Cycles cycling, rhetoric repeated
Again if not now when and then
Blindness perpetuated
Faith misrepresented
Hope coagulated
Again if not now when and then
And then and then and then…

We build- reconstruct
Piece together- what- was torn apart.
Track Name: Extinct
WORDS:

We consume, we consume
We ignore the warnings
We push and push
And take and take
And gut and burn
And scratch away
The foundation- of our home
But the earth will live
After we kill us

So many before
So many extinct
So many before
So many extinct
So why do we think we’re different

The signs abundant
As our earth was
The science has proven
Just what we have done
Yet money and greed spread faster, faster
Blinding us to the dire need to change
To change, to change
Yesterday.

So many before
So many extinct
So many before
So many extinct
So why do we think we’re different

All these minds, all this life
All our dreams to re-conceive
To reconnect
To learn to heal
To teach ourselves
What is real
Happiness doesn’t come in a package
And packages thrown away in the trash
They don’t, they don’t, they don’t
Disappear.

So many before
So many extinct…
Track Name: Sad Beautiful Eyes
WORDS:

Your sad, beautiful eyes
Glossy from when you cried
And why are taught
It’s bad to feel what we feel
When we feel so sad…

Intrinsically programmed to survive
Placated and soothed by familiar lies
Confused and disturbed as our world collide
What will we decide?

This history
Of make-believe
Pretending we are happy
We soothe ourselves
With fantasy
Exchanging truth for normalcy

Intrinsically programmed to survive
Placated and soothed by familiar lies
Confused and disturbed as our world collide
What will we decide?

And your sad, beautiful eyes
Glossy from when you were strong
Your sad, beautiful eyes
Glossy from when you were strong
Let yourself feel
And be alive
Your sad, beautiful eyes
Glossy from when you cried.
Track Name: Still Alive in Me
WORDS:

You must have heard me beg you to visit me in my dreams
Cuz there you were so beautiful- healed and smiling
I guess I never realized the pain you were going through
But I felt with your calming eyes
The comfort you now know.

I’ll never feel complete resolve with all the words unsaid
I’ll always feel a little lost, incomplete, dead
You are a part of me; you are a piece of me
My heart, breath
You are a part of me; you are a piece of me
My heart, breath
Breathe, breathe
Breathe, breathe
You’re still alive in me
Oh no no mama
No don’t leave me now mama, mama
No don’t leave me now mama, mama
No don’t leave me now mama, mama

So now in these waking dreams
I walk alone.
Tears streaming down my cheeks
Wanting my mom
So pathetic I feel at times
Seizing my own pain
But I guess that it’s all I got
Still happening.

I’ll never feel complete resolve with all the words unsaid
I’ll always feel a little lost, incomplete, dead
You are a part of me; you are a piece of me
My heart, breath
You are a part of me; you are a piece of me
My heart, breath
Breathe, breathe
Breathe, breathe
You’re still alive in me
Oh no no mama
No don’t leave me now mama, mama…
I’ve got your green eyes; I’ve got your hands
I’ve got your depression mama, mama…
Track Name: Except You
I don’t really wanna be around anyone
That is, except you
I don’t feel like I know anyone
That is, except you
And I get so pissed off
I get so bored
I get so annoyed
I get so so disappointed
When I’m with anyone
That is, except you…

And I try, I try
I try to relate
I try, I try
I try to escape
My brain
When it tells me
So many are so mundane
But I get so pissed off
I get so bored
I get so annoyed
I get so so disappointed
When I’m with anyone
That is, except you…

And maybe I am exclusive
And maybe I am reclusive
And maybe I am elusive
But I don’t really wanna be around anyone
That is, except anyone
No- I don’t feel like I know anyone
That is, except you…
Track Name: Mourning Time
WORDS:

Striving to find the humor
In all that pains my heart
At some point laughter
Keeps me- from falling apart
And I feel a connection
To those in my life who have died
Cuz I remember the humor
That kept them alive

So this morning I mourn
As I’ve mourned for years
But this time I laugh
To replace the tears
And remember the love
And remember the warmth
Remember the laughter
Remember the heart, yeah
Maybe this morning,
This mourning time has passed
But maybe this mourning time will last
Forever.

The very last time I saw her
We had a piece of cake
There was no special occasion
She said, “You never need a reason
To have cake.”
She pulled me and Katie aside
She said, “Spend some time with me.”
I can’t remember what we talked about
I just remember I felt good and loved and happy.

So this morning I mourn
As I’ve mourned for years
But this time I laugh
To replace the tears
And remember the love
And remember the warmth
Remember the laughter
Remember the heart, yeah
Maybe this morning,
This mourning time has passed
But maybe this mourning time will last
Forever.

Moving on and forgetting
Are things I’ll never do
But I guess at some point
Ya’ gotta, ya’ gotta, ya’ gotta
Get through
And feel some peace, and feel some strength,
And let yourself laugh with the memories…

So this morning I mourn
As I’ve mourned for years
But- this time I laugh
To replace the tears
And remember the love
And remember the warmth
Remember the laughter
Remember the heart, yeah
Maybe this morning,
This mourning time has passed
But maybe this mourning time will last
Forever.